Fired Up!

firedUp_poster_s600LSynopsis: The two most popular guys in high school decide to ditch football camp for cheerleader camp. For the girls and for the glory. (IMDB)

Review in short: Truthfully, this movie was painful from start to finish. Once the characters came onscreen, I instantly hated them. Credit that possibly to the terrible script or its complete lack of originality and ambition in its jokes. I hate to say it’s the worst movie ever – I’m sure there’s far worse. It didn’t strive to be much obviously, nor did I expect it to, but it wasn’t so terrible I admired it either. It was just a terrible viewing experience, boring, and deprived of any redeeming qualities.

Zero of four stars.


Bruno

bruno-b_2Yes, I endured ‘Bruno’, Sacha Baron Cohen’s latest character creation to hit cinemas. Admittedly, ‘Borat’ from 2006 had some brains to it, and while the movie had its handful of shocking moments, they didn’t completely overwhelm Cohen’s sometimes brilliant moments. The man is very talented, it’s just too bad he delves too far for laughs and will do anything to ignite controversy– the kind Sean Penn and George Clooney would kill for. ‘Bruno’ is a sad package. Cohen only goes for surface gags playing a homosexual fashion show host headed for America to become a major celebrity.

From the get-go, Cohen hits the audience over the head with heavy doses of unbelievable sexual imagery (usually covered with blurs) only meant to elicit an “Are you serious?!” response. Most audience members were covering their faces. That trend continues throughout most of this, and only sporadically do we get some of the genuine eye-opening moments the film is seemingly intended for. The film’s greatest strength comes in a scene showcasing the negligence of these psychotic parents with child-actors. During that moment, the laughs stopped and Cohen actually hit a good point. And he does a few other times, but most of the gags don’t make much sense. A few times he points out the hypocrisy of certain clueless celebrities (Paula Abdul among them). But overall, the movie is far too disturbing and outright offensive to most.  Cohen wants to paint a picture of America’s self-indulgence, intolerance, hypocrisy, and make every famous person look stupid. And he does create that, but by using and thriving off the very stereotypes he tries to lampoon. I’ll admit there are a few good jokes, and he hits a few good notes, but the shock factor is far too extreme, offensive and depraved. I left disturbed. Good thing ‘Bruno’, despite becoming the weekend’s number one movie, won’t have the popularity or staying power of ‘Borat’. I can’t believe this thing walked away with an ‘R’ rating, after apparently being edited down some — now that’s a scary thought.

[Rating:2/5]

Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs

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‘Ice Age’ has been good to Fox Studios and serviceable to audiences.  The first film was solid entertainment, the second installment a major bore, and the latest entry again decent. That’s the best compliment I can give it. As a distraction for kids, ‘Dawn of the Dinosaurs’ is better than ‘The Meltdown’ for a few reasons.

The storyline is stronger. Sid (John Leguizamo) stumbles upon three seemingly abandoned eggs beneath the ice surface and takes them to raise as his own. Out hatches three baby dinosaurs and they wreak havoc for Manny (Romano) and Ellie (Latifah) who are expecting their first youngin. When Mama T-Rex comes back for her three babies, Sid is whisked away to a jungle world beneath the ice and it’s up to Manny and team to bring him back with the help of newcomer ‘Buck,’ (the one character that doesn’t work) a swashbuckling, dinosaur-hunting weasel on a continual quest to bring down the greatest dino of them all.

The second pro: it seems as though more screen time was given to Scrat the squirrel and a new sub-plot involving a romance with Scratte, his female counterpart. Scrat’s scenes have always been the best in the series, and it’s proven even further with this sequel.i3

Final pro: Yes. This one’s in 3-D – and not a pointless 3-D. This is where 3-D sells an otherwise average movie. Pixar’s ‘Up’ didn’t need it. ‘Ice Age 3’ really puts it to use and blends the splendid animation with a surrounding landscape, and it all comes together very well. If you’re at all interested in seeing it with those goofy glasses on, more power to you — this is a strong selling point for the movie.  And, at the end of the day, I have to recommend this. It works far better than the last movie, and there’s worse animated fodder that has been released in the past. The movie is short, lively, superbly animated, in a strong 3-D format, sporadically humorous, and a solid choice for kids.  No, it’s not quite as good as ‘Up.’  It’s not Pixar. But what else is, really?

[Rating:3/5]